Prompt: You discover a lone Velociraptor in your backyard.

I opened the window to let in the spring breeze. It had been too warm these past few days and the combination of the morning sun, a cooling wind and orange juice would wake me up for a full work day.

A velociraptop leapt from the neighbour’s shrubbery into my garden. I blinket at the little dinosaur for a few moments then rolled my eyes and took out my cellphone.

“Welcome to the department of temporal misplacement. To report a historic figure press 1. To complain about prehistoric and/or futuristic wildlife press 2. If you fear you are in the wrong part of time please stay on the line.”

I pressed 2 and waited.

“Department of Prehistoric and Futuristic Wildlife Control. How can I help you?”

“Yes, I’d like to report a dinosaur in my garden.”

“What size sir?”

“Velociraptor, could you come and get it… It’s scaring the cat.”

“Of course sir… Will you be home in 17 days?”

“17 DAYS!?”

“I’m sorry sir, it’s not a T-Rex or a triceratops… We go by size.”

“Great Zeus! Can you at least give me some advice on getting rid of it.”

“Lure it out of the garden using the cat.”

“Something that won’t kill the cat.”

“Do you own a dog?”

“Listen,” I told him,”I’m a veteran, a war-hero. I fought in the war of the roses as a Centurion. I think I reserve the right to have a dinosaur removed from my garden right now.”

“Of cours sir, if it is a Brachiosaurus.”

“Alright fine, it’s a Brachiosaurus.”

“A team is on the way.”


~ by Sander on September 21, 2012.

One Response to “Prompt: You discover a lone Velociraptor in your backyard.”

  1. lol 😀 love the story. good thing he was gullable! Otherwise the velociraptor might have eaten more than just the cat.

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